Gilad Shalit

5 years  4 months ago I was coming towards the end of my first pregnancy. Just over a month before  I gave birth an Israeli soldier was kidnapped in Gaza. A week or so later the second Lebanon was started and then as the summer went on it no-one was sure if we were doing the right thing or not. On the 1st of August time and the world stopped for me when I gave birth. I held my son in my arms and nothing else mattered.

The world out side was not totally gone from the labour room. One of the first thoughts that crossed my mind was that in 18 years time this tiny little thing is going to be inducted in to the army. My baby. My soldier.

In the 5 years that have passed, every time Gilad Shalit has been mentioned in the news my personal marker for how long he has been in captivity is "How old is my son? and then and a month or so". Whilst neither my son nor Gilad Shalit know about each other, in my mind they have been inextricably linked. It all happened in "that" summer.

Things change and move on. My sons birthdays will no longer remind me how long Gilad Shalit has been in captivity. My sons Bar Mitzva will not be just past the 13 year anniversary of Gilad being captured. Gilad Shalit came home today.

But it cost us to bring him home. 1027 terrorists have been freed. People who have killed Israelis, are proud of having killed Israelis and have said they will do it again. I don't know if it was the right thing to do. We have negotiated with terrorists, we have given in to demands, we have shown what we will do to get back just one person, we have given them every incentive to kidnap someone else.

But we bought him home. We have reunited a family and freed a man.

When I first heard of the Gilad deal I was very unsure about it. It sounded like a lot to give up for one person and it just seemed wrong that we should be making such huge concessions. On the other hand as I said to someone at the time, If it was one of my sons I'd say empty every prison in the country to bring him home.

It was a very tough call to make and for the families of those who were killed in the events perpetrated by those who were freed today it must be an unbelievably hard day. I'm glad I didn't have to make the decision and I think that going through with the deal was the right thing to do. I have my doubts, questions and discomfort about parts of it but I'm glad it was done.

It makes me a little more comfortable knowing that if anything happens to my sons that I have a country that will do all it can to help them.